I'm not mean, I'm happy!

I finally figured something out this year that I have wondered about my whole life! Everyone thinks I'm mean (given), but there are some people I am absolutely not being mean to that think that, and it has always confused me. I'm not going to go into the whole process of how I realized what is going on, but here it is:
I make fun of people I like.
This is my way of "hazing" them, saying "hey, you're so cool I think you can handle a little jab." It is a supreme compliment, people. It means I think you are worthy to be my friend; I've observed you and I deem you to be intelligent, strong, funny, and confident. That is why it confuses me when people get offended. I'm trying to say "welcome to my life" and they are crying in the corner. Trust me people, you will know when I'm being mean on purpose, cause you won't be crying in the corner, you'll be bleeding. I yell when I'm angry, I get in people's faces when someone's pissing me off, I hit below the belt, I burn bridges... I attack. It's not pleasant; someone will be scarred for life, and things will be said that I can't take back.
But I understand that not everyone gets my humor, and not everyone accepts it. So for those of you who prefer that I don't "haze" you, a simple "Hey, Nena, I don't like that" will do. But if you feel up to it, sling some trash-talkin' back at me, and we'll be best friends for life!